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dont fly

last night i had a dream that the plane crashed. you know, the plane we take to get back down to the base level of campus after lunch at the top of Butte Hall, which we were eating in the cafeteria after that days class of GST. some new kids had been added to class that day, a lot of cute girls. during lunch, emilie was wearing my camo shirt and looked at me funny and then got up and sat down at all these different tables and would talk to people and then turn around and give me that same strange look.

after lunch, we boarded our flight, and took off. as we lifted, my breathing quickened and i shut my eyes, telling the person next to me that taking off always makes me nervous. the same thing happened again when i opened my eyes and looked out the window. i again explained myself, looking down always makes me nervous too. soon we were touching down on the run way. i looked up and saw "stop" written on the runway at the end, and a stop sign, right before it ended in a the side of a mountain. as i looked at it, i realized we would run into it, we were still going so fast. so we crashed into it, but spiraled around strangely so i slipped around but it was all very comfortable. when we stopped moving, i looked around, and apparently we had gone through the mountain, and were floating in this mossy sort of pond in the midst of a forest. the pilot then spoke up, "I'm dying, what about everyone else?" I shrieked, in my head, "you're dying??!?!" because you dont just say that. Then i realized it was true. and i got everyones attention and asked them who was seriously injured and who was okay, and suddenly deciding that if the pilot was dying, i couldn't have survived that crash just fine. i then assumed that i was "bleeding internally" and everything felt more panicked. no one was very vocal about any injuries so i asked if anyone knew anything about planes so we could get out. but no one answered so i looked around and pushed a few red buttons. but nothing helped. i had a looming fear that our plane would sink, seeing as we were in this pond. then i think we all fell asleep for a bit. too much trauma all at once or something. i woke up a bit later and everything seemed less immediate. i think the pilot was dead by then though. so i woke up sometime after that, having solved nothing. so for now, my dream self is eternally stuck on a crashed airplane with a dead pilot and some GST kids, about to drown.

Saturday, Jun. 05, 2004
11:27 a.m.
ebb ~ flow