some things are kind of confusing and not working right now, and it would help a lot if i were sure of myself or if anything in my head made sense. but as usual, my thoughts are jumbled and incoherent. i am constantly trying to unscramble them and make sense of them so that i can help other people understand. but i can't do it.

and so i just pull away. its easier that way. if you can't find me i don't have to deal with guilt, grief, and sorrow for what i'm not sure i'm feeling. ((i'm sorry i take the easy way out. just give me time))